Objectively dissecting my New York City stereotype

My facebook has been virally sharing this link, and it got me thinking. Everyone loves it because it’s true. And I smiled almost after every other point. So, the stereotyping isn’t exclusively for those that live in Manhattan. Even those that have lived in Brooklyn and Queens(namely, me) agree on most points.

Here:

1. When you leave the city and a cashier smiles at you and asks how your day was, you’re like:

23 Signs You've Lived In New York City Too Long

Well, I don’t know. Cashiers in Queens talk to me. Not so much Brooklyn. Definitely not Manhattan. So 0/23.

2. Dinner = hitting up your slice place at 1 a.m.

Dinner = hitting up your slice place at 1 a.m.

Yes, been there, done that! My favorite two haunts were Ozone Pizzeria and Artichoke Basille’s Pizza. 1/23

3. Nothing fills you with more rage than getting on a crowded subway car and suddenly hearing, “It’s showtime!”

Nothing fills you with more rage than getting on a crowded subway car and suddenly hearing, "It's showtime!"

Gaaaaahd, I fully and completely agree on this one. Men walk in with boomboxes and start blaring unbelievably loud music in the train. And break dance. Granted they’re talented, but no one cares! Really, it becomes so annoying after a point, you cover your ears. People in crowded trains are busy- they’re going to work early mornings, and coming back tired in the evenings. Dancing and going around with a cap isn’t even going to fetch you applause, let alone earnings. The trains are already crowded. Sitting in mortal fear of a sweaty man suddenly falling on you with all his force is unnerving(they use the train’s poles to swing around). Here are some videos- video 1, video 2, and this video that was shot while I was in the train. I mean, if you are not the Pussycat Dolls, it’s just not worth it.
2/23.

4. You have the same conversation with the same friends at the same bar every night.

23 Signs You've Lived In New York City Too Long

Yes, done that too. Minus the bar. Student life didn’t afford me regular drinking. So half a point for that. 2.5/23

5. $12 cocktails and $20 yoga classes seem normal now.

23 Signs You've Lived In New York City Too Long

You mean, they’re not?
Psst, check out Strala Yoga. At $10 per class, right beside NYU, Tara Stiles is great and totally worth it.
3.5/23

6. In the summer, you consider the wind from an approaching subway car to be “a nice breeze.”

In the summer, you consider the wind from an approaching subway car to be "a nice breeze."

Oh god, yessssssss. That feeling.
4.5/23

7. You’ve considered moving into your office to save on rent since you spend so much time there anyway.

23 Signs You've Lived In New York City Too Long

Almost. Thankfully, I shared my apartment with students. We were hoarded up together. And I lived in Queens, which is much cheaper.

8. You’ve gone from not leaving Brooklyn on the weekends, to not leaving your actual neighborhood on the weekends.

You've gone from not leaving Brooklyn on the weekends, to not leaving your actual neighborhood on the weekends.

Totally. I’d do it as Manhattan –> Brooklyn–> Friends’ apartments nearby –> my own neighborhood. Some days, the crowds get to you.
5.5/23

9. Savings account? HAHA, good one.

23 Signs You've Lived In New York City Too Long

Fully agree, of course. How can you save if you’re eating food to survive? 6.5, nay, 7/23

10. You’ve Seamlessed lunch and dinner in the same day and not given a shit.

You've Seamlessed lunch and dinner in the same day and not given a shit.

Yes, and I’ve actually eaten this same food’s vegetarian version. I survived on falafel over rice and tortillas with black beans during exams.
8/23

11. This is sadly accurate.

23 Signs You've Lived In New York City Too Long

I dont’ watch Gossip Girl, so no clue. I’m excluding this point. 8/22 then.

12. You’ve flipped off a tourist bus.

You've flipped off a tourist bus.

Haha, no. I personally believe in spreading the good cheer, so I’ve waved. But I’ve wanted to many times, and my friends have.. so… 9/22.

13. You wear earbuds while grocery shopping.

You wear earbuds while grocery shopping.

And while walking on the streets, while in the train, while in school, while working out, and while being on the phone. The habit has stuck, by the way.
10/22

14. You’ve become immune to the hot garbage smell.

23 Signs You've Lived In New York City Too Long

Yes, I have. 11/22

15. You can swipe your Metrocard without breaking stride.

You can swipe your Metrocard without breaking stride.

Oh yeah! I’ve actually been stopped by tourists who ask me how I do that. Well, if you’re doing it four times a day, you get the hang of it soon enough. 12/22

16. You go to the bodega in your pajamas.

You go to the bodega in your pajamas.

I go to even Wholefoods in my pajamas. What’s your point? 13/22

17. When you visit the suburbs and try to sleep at night, the silence scares you.

23 Signs You've Lived In New York City Too Long

Really, it does. It’s unnerving. I lived right beside an airport before moving to NY, so that too. Thankfully, I live beside an Air Force Base now! 14/22

18. You’ve forgotten how to drive a car.

23 Signs You've Lived In New York City Too Long

Sigh. And my license is about to expire soon too. 15/22

19. You’ve stopped going out on Friday nights and started going out on Tuesday nights.

23 Signs You've Lived In New York City Too Long

I’m not a party animal. But out with friends- wouldn’t matter which night. Then again, we started avoiding fridays because of the loud drunkenness around. So I suppose 16/22

20. You walk faster than most people run.

23 Signs You've Lived In New York City Too Long

And wore out two shoes in two years. 17/22

21. You’ve either gotten really into cooking, or totally given up on cooking.

You've either gotten really into cooking, or totally given up on cooking.

I gave up. Not that I cooked before. 18/22

22. You get outraged when a Duane Reade isn’t open 24 hours.

You get outraged when a Duane Reade isn't open 24 hours.

Now see, a friend who was traveling the next morning forgot to buy something for his mom. He remembered that at 1.30am. Where would you go? A Duane Reade. And if it’s closed, well, shouldn’t that be illegal or something? 19/22

23. You relish getting out of the city any chance you get…

23 Signs You've Lived In New York City Too Long

If you get out of the city, you can drive. In cars. And see lawns and yards and stuff. Houses have actual fencing! There are houses! Of course, I wouldn’t move anywhere else. Still. 20/22

But when you return to New York, you realize you couldn’t possibly live anywhere else.

23 Signs You've Lived In New York City Too Long

I already covered that.
So in conclusion, yes, I’ve had too much of the city. And I love it. It’s probably the only place I actually miss so much I could cry. No, seriously. This image goes here.
23 Signs You've Lived In New York City Too Long
PS: I’ll write a better blog post soon, okay?
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